An Open Letter to the Best Western Hotel Pilotti, Vantaa

To Whom It May Concern,
 I recently stayed at the Best Western in Vantaa, close to the Helsinki Airport in Finland. I had an amazing time in Finland. Met some relatives, saw the sights, made some friends, learnt the language, got a bruise from an amusement park ride and got to see what Finland really is all about. I was there for two weeks and sadly the 15 hours I spent in your hotel was the lowest point I spent in your hotel.

I realise how ridiculous and stupid it is posting something like this online. It's a super first world problem to complain about any sort of luxury and I think hotels definitely included in that category, especially chain hotels. I'm not a geriatric, I'm not someone who writes letters to editors, but I am someone who believes in good service. I arrived at your hotel around seven in the evening, which in the Finnish daylight, looks like an average autumn afternoon. Your shuttle bus driver was more than kind and friendly and helpful and I wish, at the time, I had Euro to give him for a tip. The problems began at the front desk. There was an attendant or staff member there who was not exactly helpful during our check-in. I asked some simple question and he referred us to the usual Hotel manual that comes with every hotel room. I was tired and understood the situation but still I asked him another question and he honestly couldn't answer it.

Even if you were hot or new, I could understand, but this was ridiculous

It wasn't a language barrier issue as he was wearing a tag that, I assumed, meant he would be fluent in English and Finnish, or he was a British ex-pat. It was late and maybe he had been there for a twelve-hour shift, I shrugged, asked for the Wi-Fi password, got our suitcases and headed upstairs. Upon opening the door, we were welcomed with a warm climate and a TV that had been left on and was quite loud. I turned it straight off and found the nearest window. Again, shrugged and moved on.

...then promptly opened the window and stepped outside.

I always love reading the hotel room manuals. It's like getting an instruction manual for a room, which is rare unless you go to IKEA. Alas, it was unable to be seen and I was quite disappointed as one would like to know if there is a room service number just in case one gets incredibly lazy and can't walk down the hallway to the restaurant,. Again, shrug, move on.

Do you know how fucking comforting this thing is?

But here's the real kick in the dick. I tried the wireless internet your hotel provided and found on multiple occasions to get barely a signal. I became incredibly frustrated finding any point in the room which would provide a better Wi-Fi signal. Eventually, I gave up when I found two bars when I sat down to write my Steam Sale blog post. It was a fruitless endeavour that I eventually compensated with giving up and having dinner with my loving girlfriend. After a lovely meal, we returned to the room where the highlight of the night was watching the 2001 Chris Klein movie Say It Isn't So, with Finnish subtitles and showing my girlfriend one of the lamps had dangerously frayed wires.

Underrated, even without the Finnish subtitles.

Now, it wasn't all bad, I'll give you that. The beds were the most comfortable sleep I've had in quite a while, the food in the restaurant and breakfast buffet were amazing and the girl who served us was the kindest and sweetest waitress I'd seen my entire time in Finland. However, I have to say, I specifically chose your hotel for three reasons. Proximity to the airport, due to a flight, breakfast buffet and wireless internet. Whilst you hit a home run with the second, the first and third were a bit of an issue. I did state before I was more than pleased with getting from the airport to the hotel, however, getting from the hotel to the airport was met with a compromise.

The tigers...they were the compromise.

The airport shuttle runs between the mid afternoon and nine in the morning. That's all well and fine for all those who were coming and going in between those times, but it's ridiculous to shut it off between nine in the morning and in the afternoon. They have to be your busiest hours, non? I understand this is more of a subjective issue, but I just found it frustrating but also relieving in possibly the cruelest way possible. We had a flight leaving at 1pm and wanted to be there at 11am, so we decided to shrug and take the high road by just leaving at 9.

...and I fucking stole everything.

I found the Wi-Fi and my enjoyment levels waiting for two hours to check in for a flight, more enjoyable than most of my stay at your hotel. I would have rather taken that early bus and gone to the airport, than waited the two extra hours in that room. Of course, this is clearly due to my Dopamine levels linked to internet communication, but still, I thought it was something to take into consideration.

I'm also into Firewire...

I may or may not ever stay at a Best Western again, but I know where I won't be staying. Thank you anyone reading this. I am currently in a hotel room in Turkey, naked, with air-conditioning, amazing internet and a hotel manual, ready to enjoy myself for two days and nights, all for half the price I paid at the Best Western Hotel Pilotti in Vantaa, Finland
Signed,
Harrison Engstrom*


*I write this purely from my own hands and my girlfriend didn't want any say in it.


Share all your bad holiday stories in the comments or tell me on Twitter

Addendum: Since posting this, as you can see in the comments, my post was taken into consideration and I do have to say, whilst I did not enjoy my time at the Best Western Hotel Pilotti, still think of it as an option and maybe call or send an email to their staff if you have time.

Sleeping with Finland

As some of you may know, that during the Summer, Finland is a bit like living in a TV sitcom. There is way too much sunlight for a normal day and at night, dusk seems to be the only setting. The faded light seems to come in just after eleven at night and it kind of feels like you're in the worst scene of an alien abduction film.

No, Finland is not filled with anal probes.

All of Finland is quite lovely, especially out in the countryside and the night's are even more spectacular. The worst you'll hear is a kid ringing their bell on a bicycle. I'm sure it's like being in the country for many other...continents, but the best part is you don't understand anything. It may sound like a hindrance, regarding the language barrier, but when you have no idea what people are yelling or talking to each other about, it just fades into the rest of the ambiance of the night with the crickets and owls of the night.

Hey, did you hear a Finnish person?

And because of that, the nightlife doesn't really exist during the summer. During a short stay in Helsinki, a small nightclub was down the road from where we were staying. My girlfriend and I were heading home from an amusement park at ten at night and saw many a goth and biker lined up in pure daylight. The only other time you see these folk is when they run out of milk, make up, pig's blood or motor oil. It was quite an amusing sight to see: Two young lovebirds hand in hand, holding a small Yoshi under one of their arms, which they'd won and a group of slightly tipsy and surly people dressed in all black standing in line and smoking ahead of them; 'twas indeed a contrast.

I thought goths sparkled in the daylight...or do they just hang out in trees?

But I do love the Finnish people. Despite my own very loud heritage reminding me weekly of how Finnish I was, the people of this cold and forest filled country are quiet and friendly. To put it this way, the first people we stayed with are the, and try and take it a step at a time, the cousin of my grandmother's, wife's sister and her boyfriend.

Totes related....

Also should mention that there is an odd satisfaction saying that you're at an amusement park til closing time, especially when that closing time is 10pm. I should also classify that I hate amusement parks. I'm awful with heights, being upside-down and I think perpetual motion is a crime against nature, so rides are often not that great for me, but I had a hell of a time at Linnanmaki. 

Eat a dick, Dreamworld.

Linnanmaki is an amusement park in Helsinki that is over five decades old and looks like it was made only a decade ago. There are hardly any kids when you go late at "night" and the lines are so short for the last hour, you practically get a ride every three minutes. We also met a really cool guy there Matias who told us just as we were leaving that we could pay five extra Euro and come back tomorrow. That's it. There's no extra bit of money or anything else. That's the rule, you pay for this extra ticket and the only problem is you have to wear the wristband for an extra day, like that is ever a problem.

I own you now.

Finland has been an exquisite country to be in and the hospitality has never ever gone to waste. Their menu is quite diverse and we've had everything from Pizza, to Steak, to Hamburger, because we're horrible tourists. I think Finland is a place people avoid due to a lack of knowledge or thinking it's just cold, but in the summer climate, the worse it gets down to, even in the night, is about 15 degrees. The days are at worse, a good Australian autumn day and I have seen barely a sliver of snow, sadly, since I landed. I really do love it here and while I will probably not write much more about my travels. I will say this, Estonia is a hellhole.

Hell is other prostitutes, right?

This is a fraction of my entire time I've been in Europe, but I just thought I might as well write about something I've been thinking a lot about today, which is how every blog post begins. Sleeping with Finland is like being a bed and breakfast with a cute quiet girl who keeps wanting to give you potatoes at every meal. It's a stunning country and even if you speak five to ten words, you can get by.

Meidän ei tarvitse tehdä mitään tänään, me?

 Estonia is still a hell hole...